To A Woman Whose Mother Had Died

A Letter by Robert Crosbie, founder of the United Lodge of Theosophists

Published in “The Friendly Philosopher” p. 198-200

Your note and questions were handed to me last evening and I am glad to reply.

From your statement I should say that you brought forward from a previous life that extension of sight and hearing which you possess. It is not a “gift”; it was acquired by you while in a body before.

The strong tie between yourself and your mother does not come, in my opinion, from the fact of your physical relation in this life, but is a soul bond in other lives, and not necessarily in the same relation as in this life, although that could very well be. The fact remains that there is a strong bond between your soul and hers – a bond of unselfish love, the strongest power in the world.

As all human beings are primarily spiritual beings, the earth is not their permanent abiding place; they are born into bodies, live, form their relations as physical, psychic, and spiritual beings, and again return to their own more real and abiding states.

As you may be aware, the universe exists for the purposes of soul, and our entrance into earthly existence is but one phase of our continuous conscious existence. When we sleep, whether our consciousness be in the dream state or in inner and deeper ones, our real (subjective) relations with other human beings continue. So also, at death, when we leave the body, we pass into a state like to the dream state for awhile, and then enter into the fullest enjoyment of a self-conscious existence which creates for itself its own surroundings with all those loved during the life last lived. The state is called Devachan – or the state of the “gods.” When one whom we have loved has left the body, he carries with him whatever he has felt, loved, or despised. Since he, as well as those he has left in bodies, has the interior states and forms, that which is felt by him is felt inwardly by those in bodies; the impress of the feeling of the departed is carried so as to be recognized as such. The feeling of nearness, the sense of receiving words, admonitions, or encouragement is due to the inner relation and love of the departed, who are not physically near, nor are they aware of our daily earthly experiences, but their love ever operates as a protection and as a help, for they are connected with us in our inner and higher nature. In our inner states we see, feel, understand, and translate that connection into terms of everyday life.

You can understand that there could be no happiness for our departed loved ones if they were aware of our trials and troubles in earthly existence. The Soul’s need for the undisturbed assimilation of the highest and best of its life’s experience requires that only the inner contact shall be held, and that is above the exigencies of the physical embodiment.

The “dim vapor” which you saw in the death hour was the withdrawal of the “astral form” from the physical one; the senses, faculties, and feelings of the departed were in that astral “body.” It represented the physical form, for it was that into which the purely physical elements had been drawn and which was now discarding them.

You did exactly the right thing to have allowed the body to rest and to have remained quiet until the process of separation from the body had been completed. This must have come from inner understanding, as you do not seem to be acquainted with the rationale of the process. You had an inner and truer perception than those who thought you had “lost your mind.” The fact was that they had not found theirs, being bound up in their physical perceptions and senses.

What you feel and understand to be of “her busy life over there and of friends she has met,” are representative of her thoughts and feelings and are not actual actions on her part, for she is in a subjective state and is not in contact with other beings, except in a subjective way – that is, she is thinking of them in various ways and relations, and you perceive the subjects of her thoughts and actions.

I do not know whether you have read the Ocean of Theosophy. It gives a great deal about post-mortem states, as also does the Key to Theosophy. A reading and re-reading of them would be a help to you in understanding that the real contact we have with others is in Thought, Will, and Feeling, which is not dependent upon bodily relations or contact.

If the writer can further help you in understanding, he will be glad.